Losing a Loved One
I had never really thought about losing my parents. I guess I just thought that they would live forever. I mean, the last time I saw my 92-year-old dad, we joked about him living to be 100 with my mom by his side. We still had plenty of time. Or so I thought.
When I got the phone call that my 88-year-old mother fell ill and was in hospice, I was devastated. My first thought was “what happened?”, followed by the memory of my mom healthy, happy, laughing, and loving life not very long ago.
My parents recently sold their Medina home and they were living their retirement dream at their lake house in the Smoky Mountains. The nine hours between us meant that I couldn’t hold her hand so I said my goodbyes over the phone as my niece held the phone up to her ear. I could hear her mumble and was told she smiled and shook her head as she heard my voice. She knew it was me and as I said goodbye, I knew that was it.
This story is one most are familiar with because it is the normal course of events. Parents are supposed to die and the generations that follow are supposed to have a natural, built-in innate capacity to handle it. I’m not sure where that notion came from, but what I do know is that picking up that phone call was probably the hardest thing I have ever done in my 58-year life. On top of that, I didn’t even consider the toll that it was taking on my husband of 39 years. They were his parents too.
This stress immediately started to take a toll on our bodies – both physically and mentally. When there’s stress in the external environment and stress in the internal environment, we start to see an increase in inflammation in our body. Inflammation affects our body’s ability to detox. So what did I do and what can you do the next time an expected stress crashes into your world?
I pulled every tool that I had out of my wellness toolbox. First, we started wrapping ourselves up in the castor oil packs every night before bed after bathing in Epsom salt, baking soda, and lavender oil. We also increased our Vitamin D levels for the days that followed. Knowing that we had a funeral ahead, and that we would be exposed to numerous people, we increased our Vitamin C, and added zinc and quercetin with nettles. Our daily silver solution increased, and we started nebulizing a solution of 3% food grade hydrogen peroxide. Since our sleep patterns were interrupted, we took that extra time in the medical massage chair with our infrared light every opportunity that we had.
Music is often what people turn to when looking for hope, inspiration, or a way to capture their feelings. We love the WholeTones frequency based therapeutic music. I purchased WholeTones many years ago because it’s been clinically proven to improve sleep, relieve stress, calm and soothe. It was exactly what we needed to help us through the long days.
Lastly, I encourage you to look at what you can learn from hard times and unexpected experiences. The loss of my own mother has forever changed me, but what I gained was an important experience in putting life into perspective as we help prepare our children for the loss of us.
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